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Rhymed Blank Verse: Thomas Hood

October 26, 2014
Thomas Hood (1799-1845), artist unknown.

Thomas Hood (1799-1845), artist unknown.

Thomas Hood penned the following bit of whim.



SIR . — In one of your Annuals you have given insertion to “A Plan for Writing Blank Verse in Rhyme”; but as I have seen no regular long poem constructed on its principles, I suppose the scheme did not take with the literary world. Under these circumstances I feel encouraged to bring forward a novelty of my own, and I can only regret that such poets as Chaucer and Cottle, Spenser and Hayley, Milton and Pratt, Pope and Pye, Byron and Batterbee, should have died before it was invented. The great difficulty in verse is avowedly the rhyme. Dean Swift says somewhere in his letters, “that a rhyme is as hard to find with him as a guinea,” — and we all know that guineas are proverbially scarce among poets. The merest versifier that ever attempted a Valentine must have met with this Orson, some untameable savage syllable that refused to chime in with society. For instance, what poetical Foxhunter—a contributor to the Sporting Magazine—has not drawn all the covers of Beynard, Ceynard, Deynard, Feynard, Geynard, Heynard, Keynard, Leynard, Meynard, Neynard, Peynard, Queynard, to find a rhyme for Reynard? The spirit of the times is decidedly against Tithe; and I know of no tithe more oppressive than that poetical one, in heroic measure, which requires that every tenth syllable shall pay a sound in kind. How often the Poet goes up a line, only to be stopped at the end by an impracticable rhyme, like a bull in a blind alley! I have an ingenious medical friend, who might have been an eminent poet by this time, but the first line he wrote ended in ipecacuana, and with all his physical and mental power, he has never yet been able to find a rhyme for it. The plan I propose aims to obviate this hardship. My system is, to take the bull by the horns; in short, to try at first what words will chime, before you go further and fare worse. To say nothing of other advantages, it will at least have one good effect—and that is, to correct the erroneous notion of the would-be poets and poetesses of the present day, that the great end of poetry is rhyme. I beg leave to present a specimen of verse, which proves quite the reverse, and am, Sir, your most obedient servant,
John Dryden Grubb.

The Double Knock

Rat-tat it went upon the lion’s chin,
“That hat, I know it!” cried the joyful girl;
“Summer’s it is, I know him by his knock,
Comers like him are welcome as the day!
Lizzy! go down and open the street-door,
Busy I am to any one but him.
Know him you must — he has been often here;
Show him up stairs, and tell him I ‘m alone.”
Quickly the maid went tripping down the stair;
Thickly the heart of Rose Matilda beat;
“Sure he has brought me tickets for the play—
Drury—or Covent Garden—darling man!—
Kemble will play—or Kean who makes the soul
Tremble; in Richard or the frenzied Moor—
Farren, the stay and prop of many a farce
Barren beside—or Liston, Laughter’s Child—
Kelly the natural, to witness whom
Jelly is nothing in the public’s jam—
Cooper, the sensible—and Walter Knowles
Super, in William Tell—now rightly told.
Better—perchance, from Andrews, brings a box,
Letter of boxes for the Italian stage—
Brocard! Donzelli! Taglioni! Paul!
No card—thank heaven—engages me to-night!
Feathers, of course, no turban, and no toque—
Weather’s against it, but I’ll go in curls.
Dearly I dote on white—my satin dress,
Merely one night—it won’t be much the worse—
Cupid—the New Ballet I long to see—
Stupid! why don’t she go and ope the door!”
Glistened her eye as the impatient girl
Listened, low bending o’er the topmost stair.
Vainly, alas! she listens and she bends,
Plainly she hears this question and reply:
“Axes your pardon, Sir, but what cl’ ye want?”
“Taxes,” says he, “and shall not call again!”

Hood has thrown down a gauntlet, here. If we can shift the rhyme from the 5th position in a purportedly pentameter line to the first, then why not to the 2nd, 3rd, or 4th? For that matter, why not call for a poem in pentameter in which the rhyming foot slides, in a regulated way, from position to position? I speak of pentameter lines, because that’s what blank verse is said to entail (five feet, five beats). But his mischief runs further than the shifting of (almost entirely) two-syllable trochaic rhymes, and we shouldn’t take him prima facie in this jeu d’sprit.

Nicholson Naker

Nicholson Baker

As is the case with so much light verse, Hood’s lines, here, tend rather toward triplet meter, falling out of step with “five-foot” lines, and, in fact, bearing out an argument made in Nicholson Baker‘s charming novel, The Anthologist. Narrating that book is Paul Chowder, a poet, and he’s at work on an anthology titled Only Rhyme. Threading its way in among plot-lines to do with Chowder’s personal misfortunes (his girlfriend, Roz, has left him), or to do with his dog Smacko, or his neighbour Nannette, is a running debate as to the nature of the pentameter line, and as to the real locomotion of poetry in English:

And yes, of course, there are things that should be said about iambic pentameter, and I don’t want to lose sight of that. I don’t want to slight “the longer line.” I hope we can get to that fairly soon. My theory — I can’t resist giving you a little glimpse of it here — my theory is that iambic pentameter is in actuality a waltz. It’s not five-beat rhythm, even though “pent” means five, because five beats would be totally off-kilter and ridiculous and would never work and would be a complete disaster and totally unlistenable. Pentameter, so called, if you listen to it with an open ear, is a slow kind of gently swaying three-beat minuetto. Really, I mean it.

Thomas Hood inadvertently bears Paul Chowder out, because although all lines in “The Double Knock” have ten syllables, and many can be laid on the Procrustean bed of the five-stress line—”Rat-tat it went upon the lion’s chin”—the real motive here is a four-beat rhythm with a little anapestic motive as its subroutine, or, as The Anthologist has it, the minuet, or waltz, that Chowder hears in all but the most programmatic pentameter lines:

Rat-tat it went upon the lion’s chin,
“That hat, I know it!” cried the joyful girl;
Summer’s it is, I know him by his knock,
Comers like him are welcome as the day!
Lizzy! go down and open the street-door,
Busy I am to any one but him.

Hear that? Four beats, carried off with triplet-anapests tossed in, as for a waltz. Paul Chowder is dancing, up in his barn. Perhaps The Anthologist is among the happier contributions to poetics published since Derek Attridge published The Rhythms of English Poetry in 1982—a book, by the way, that Chowder commends.

Incidentally, a Mr. Heyward Smith once googled Hood’s poem in 1906. Edward Rankle googled back:

From The New York Times, September 1, 1906.

From The New York Times, September 1, 1906.

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